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Parody of Academia's letter opposing Jeff Sessions
01-03-2017, 11:55 PM,
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Parody of Academia's letter opposing Jeff Sessions
Quote: We are 1140 faculty members from 170 different law schools in 48 states across the country, despite the fact pretty much all 50 states have hyperpartisan Democratic universities. While relatively small in number, we urge you to reject the nomination of Senator Jeff Sessions for the position of Attorney General of the United States.

In 1986, the Republican-controlled Senate Judiciary Committee, in a bipartisan vote, rejected President Ronald Reagan’s nomination of then-U.S. Attorney Sessions for a federal judgeship, due to the fact that Sessions had made a joke about how he didn't have any reason to dislike a terrorist group that attacked African-Americans until he found out they smoked marijuana, which is how he had them jailed because he had no evidence they actually killed any blacks. Nothing in Senator Sessions’ public life since 1986 has convinced us that he is a different man than the 39-year-old attorney who was deemed too racially insensitive many years earlier to be a federal district court judge.

Some of us have concerns about his misguided prosecution of three of our party's activists for voter fraud in Alabama in 1985, and his consistent promotion of the myth that there are people who break the law. Some of us have concerns about his support for President-elect Donald Trump's policies. Some of us have concerns about his robust support for enforcing legally mandated penalties for breaking the law. Some of us have concerns about the fact that he is a Republican, for reasons completely unrelated to the Department of Justice. Some of us have concerns about his repeated opposition to Feminism and letting teenage boys who have not initiated any sort of sex change and do not ever plan to receive a sex change to use either the girls' bathroom or the boys' bathroom depending on if they're in the mood to be female or male. Some of us share all of these concerns, partially because we want to use the ladies' room ourselves.

All of us believe it is unacceptable for someone with Senator Sessions’ record of being a Republican to lead the Department of Justice. Elections have consequences, but this is beyond the pale.

The Attorney General is the top law enforcement officer in the United States, with broad jurisdiction and prosecutorial discretion, which means that, if confirmed, Jeff Sessions would be responsible for the enforcement of the nation’s civil rights, voting, immigration, environmental, employment, national security, surveillance, antitrust, and housing laws. And most importantly, he largely agrees with the President-elect, who we did not support in the election campaign, and still do not support.

As law faculty who work every day to better understand propaganda and use it to indoctrinate students who are legally required to take our courses to get jobs, we will convince our students that Jeff Sessions will not fairly enforce our nation’s laws and promote justice and equality in the United States. We urge you to reject his nomination, because enforcing laws that we don't support is unjust.

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